Do you ever have one of those days? You know.. those days that nobody has to actually say anything to specify what day you're having, yet know what you mean? It's the day that nothing in particular has occurred to make you have one of those days; you just do. You just feel a way, you think a way, and you somehow fail at productivity at being anything but that way. You aren't down, but you certainly aren't up. You aren't yet inspired, but you so desperately want to be.
It's the day when music takes you away. When silence is too much for you to handle. Your head hurts just enough to remind you that you do have a mind to think with, and your cravings remind you to eat.
If life didn't happen around you, you could go the entire day without human interaction. If kids didn't need food, work didn't need work and family didn't worry about your mental well being, you could find a nice little lean-to in the woods and just waste away.
It's the day when you're everywhere but where you are, but not exactly with your own aspirations-- just your thoughts of bland emotion. Your happy thoughts aren't really anywhere to be found, but you aren't wallowing in self sorrow either.
Sadly, for an artist.. it's the day you get things done. It's the day you create, the day you lose yourself in whatever it is that inspires you to be anything but whatever it is that you are being right now. It's the day you dream, and the day that you re-route your feelings of dull nothingness into something larger than you.
I say sadly, because when you're stuck at work with a million things on your desk to do, you can't.
You just end up existing. Taking up space. Wasting away.
I just want to go get lost.